The culture strongly encourages girls to discuss intimate matters only with other women. Who but a woman would understand a woman’s experience?
Of course, this deprives girls of a good relationship with the most important man in their lives. And it also tells them that the only people they should listen to are people who are just like them. So much for empathy. Narcissism, anyone?
And let’s be clear. While Time Magazine sexes up the topic by referring to sex talks, most girls do not want to sit around talking about gross anatomy with their fathers.
What they do want, and what they would find helpful, is an open line of communication, through which they could learn how boys see them, what it means when boys behave this way or that, how best to negotiate the difficulties of adolescent flirtations.
Wouldn’t it be a good idea for girls to learn something about the male mind, and, at the same time, to learn how to confide in an adult male whose primary desire is to protect them and help guide their growth and development?
via stuartschneiderman.blogspot.com
I am blessed and honored to be the wife of a man who loves our daughter - now 14 - to pieces. From the day we first heard her heartbeat at my three-month pregnancy check-up and to this day, he has showered her with love and attention, instruction and correction.
I, too, was blessed with a wonderful father, and I can give my personal affirmation that his influence in my life has made me stronger, wiser, more confident and happier than I would have been without him. For a general idea of how much my Daddy affected me and my life, you can check out these posts.
I see in my daughter a similar confidence and self-assurance. She loves attention, but she's not desperate for it. She's confident, but not arrogant. She is open, honest, and truly a joy to be around - and I'm not saying that due to my bias in her favor! I can attribute a lot of my Darling Munchkin's excellent character to the influence and guidance of her father, my Beloved Husband.
So, if you're a father of a daughter, love her and cherish her. Talk to her. Spend time with her... and love her mother, too!
You know, my little girls are the center of my world... the confidence thing? Totally true... the more I cuddle and talk and hold hands and show books and garden with them, you can just see their little confidence meters go up!
...then they go punch their brothers!
Good post, Kat. Thanks for sharing the thought.
Posted by: Shaun Kenney | October 27, 2010 at 08:32 PM
LOL, Shaun! Yeah, well, sometimes the sibling rivalry rears its ugly head.
My Munchkin, as you know, is an only. She loves spending time with me and with my Beloved - she has favorite topics for each of us. Her Dad is quite up front about boys and how they are, and I remind her of God's plan for marriage. My daughter gets plenty of appropriate male attention from her Daddy - and isn't interested in chasing after immature boys to get affirmation.
One statistic that is too often ignored is that girls who have strong, loving relationships with their fathers are far less likely to have unwed pregnancies and a string of sexual encounters. They are more likely to do well in school and in life.
God willing, He will bring a young man of good character, wit, strength and tenderness into her life... and after a merry chase, my Beloved will walk his precious daughter down the aisle and place her into this young man's care.
And on that day, I will rejoice and thank God for the husband He gave me!
Posted by: Kat | October 27, 2010 at 08:46 PM